(18, WA, USA) Maira - Turning Point

Relational turning points alter the course of a relationship. Once one of these turning points is reached, there is no way to revert to how the relationship was before. These turning points often follow Knapp’s staircase model of relational stages. However, turning points are not always positive and may involve negative interactions. Examples of turning points include first kisses, the first big fight, marriage, having children, and declaring an official relationship.

My now-boyfriend and I had been friends for three years before entering into our relationship. Our significant relational turning point was transitioning from friends to official partners. The build-up to this transition began with us talking and hanging out more often. One Friday afternoon, he invited me to get boba with him. He picked me up around one, and the tension between us was palpable. We ordered and drank our boba, and then it was time for the drive home. The conversation shifted to a discussion of when our feelings for each other started to develop. I had been nervous throughout the date, wondering where we stood. The topic of dating came up in conversation, and without thinking, I said, “So, are we?” He responded with a look of surprise and said, “Do you want to?” I quickly replied, “I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t want to.” Later, I discovered he was worried about rushing and felt relieved by my quick actions. He knew it would be my first relationship and wanted me to take things at my own pace.

My example of a relational turning point is a positive one. My partner and I experienced build-up and excitement leading up to the official turning point. This turning point shifted our relationship from friends to lovers. There is no way to revert back to the same friendship with no strings attached that we once had. The simple labeling of our romantic relationship has changed the course of our status.